"Molly!" someone was calling my name but I couldn't seem to see them, only a blurry outline of a person. I closed my eyes again.
When I tried to open them again I felt like I was moving, or where ever I was was moving anyway. Everything was still blurry but I heard short, clipped voices around me. "Patient is 23 year old, Caucasian female..." the words started to blend together and I felt the darkness coming again.
"Pregnant..." I tried to say, though it was barely a whisper and I sounded so very hoarse. I closed my eyes again.
There was more movement, more rushing and more rapid talk all around me. I couldn't begin to process everything they were saying but I felt hands all over me. I think I tried to sit up but several hands pushed me back down and a plastic mask was placed over my face.
I closed my eyes again.
"Her family is all in America, I don't want her to be alone..." someone was saying the next time I felt semiconscious. I tried to turn to face the voices, but my body refused to cooperate and I felt like I'd been run over by a truck. I closed my eyes again.
I opened my eyes and was relieved to find that the blurry haze had disappeared finally. I was in a hospital room, that much was clear as I took in my sterile white surroundings. An IV was hooked up to one hand and the other was heavily bandaged. I furrowed by brow as I looked at the damaged hand. "What happened to my hand?" I croaked, though I'm not sure who I thought I was speaking to.
To my left, I heard movement as a chair squeaked under the weight of someone. "You dropped the vase and when you fainted, your hand landed in the glass shards." a very familiar voice explained.
I slowly turned my head to the left and tried to smile. "What are you doing here?" I could tell there was medication in my system as my voice was a little slurred.
"You still had me as your emergency contact with your apartment, so they called me when you were found." Colin said, coming closer to the bed and taking my wounded hand carefully in his.
"Oh." I said, "I fainted?" I asked trying to remember what had happened. I remembered saying goodbye to Tony and I remember the flowers but everything else was a blur.
"Yes, in front of your apartment door. A neighbor found you and called for help when they couldn't get a response. Your building manager called me and then the hospital called me but I was already on my way." he explained. "I arrived a couple hours ago."
"But why did I faint?" I cringed as everything I said made my throat feel even worse.
Colin got a little uncomfortable at my question. "I should leave that for the doctors to tell you." he said, reaching for the nurse call button.
I squeezed his hand. "Colin please...tell me." His hand stopped midair and he looked at me.
He sighed but gave me a reassuring smile, "You're fine Molly, everything is fine." he said gently.
I reached my hand down to my abdomen, touching the faint but familiar bump that housed the baby and was reassured, knowing somehow that he was right and everything, that everyone, was fine. I don't know if it was hormones or a reaction to the stress but I started crying, slowly at first and then all out sobbing.
"Shh Molly" Colin said leaning over the edge of the bed to stroke my hair. I still held fast to his other hand, terrified that he might leave, might remember why he left before. I felt the bed shift as Colin climbed in next to me and let me snuggle against him crying. "It's alright Molly, your baby is okay." he whispered softly, still stroking my hair. I laid my head on his chest and he held me close and let me cry.
After several minutes the tears stopped and I pulled back from him enough to look at his face. "I'm sorry Colin." I whispered.
"For what Molly?" Colin asked, gently stroking my hair.
"Everything." I said, I felt the tears sting my eyes again. He didn't stop holding me until the doctor came in awhile later.
------
"Morning Molly." Dr. Nan said as she walked in for her morning rounds. Colin was sleeping in the small chair next to my bed. I'd tried to convince him to go home after I'd spent the last day sobbing on his shirt, I told him I was fine but he refused to leave. "How are you feeling?"
"Awful." I said honestly. The day before she'd explained that my body had started to go into very premature labor. They managed to stop it but I also lost a lot of blood in the process and was now very weak and still at risk for premature labor.
"I know." she said sympathetically. Colin must have heard us because he stirred in the chair and woke up. "Can you give us a moment Mr. Beckham?" Dr. Nan addressed him.
"Of course." Colin said standing up and stretching. I think my face may have betrayed me because he came over and kissed my forehead. "I'll be right back - I'll just go get some coffee." he said, gently squeezing my hand. He nodded to the doctor and closed the door quietly behind him.
"He cares about you very much." Dr. Nan observed. When I didn't reply she went about checking me. "Have you told the father yet?" she asked after she was done.
I shook my head. I'd spent so much of the day before either crying or sleeping I hadn't even looked at my phone. In fact I wasn't even sure if my phone was here in the hospital or still sitting in the hall outside my apartment. I shifted in the bed and instantly regretted it; my whole body was sore and every bit of movement felt like I was being punched.
"Well I want to keep you here for a few more days to make sure that baby is staying put for awhile longer." Dr Nan said, making notes in my chart. "I think Mr. Beckham has already called your work place though."
"Yesterday." Colin said from the doorway, his coffee in hand. "They were quite understanding."
"Good." the doctor said. "I'll be back to check on you later Molly." she added and left.
"Thank you Colin, you didn't have to - I could have called them today." I said, though I knew it was probably better this way.
"It's not a problem Molly." he said. He pulled out his own cell phone and held it out to me. "But you should call Tony and let him know what happened."
I took the phone slowly and stared at him. He'd never asked who the father was, he'd never even asked who I'd cheated with - he just knew. "How did you know?" I whispered.
"Educated guess." Colin said. "I can step out if you want..."
"No, it's fine. Stay please." I dialed Tony's number slowly, my hand shaking as I did so. The phone went straight to voice mail and I frowned. "His phone is off." I didn't even know what to say so I hung up and decided I'd call him later.
We watched the TV in the room together and talked a bit, I felt incredibly tired and found myself dozing off constantly. I was somewhere between sleep and awake when I heard a light knock at the door. Colin got up to meet the person, probably yet another nurse coming to take my vitals. I could hear the door open, "Molly?" Colin said, leaning close to me to see if I was awake. "You have a visitor Molly." I opened my eyes and looked up at him.
His face was very carefully controlled but I detected a small frown and looked past him. Tony was standing in the doorway, looking at me anxiously.
"I'm going to go get some fresh air," Colin said. "I'll be back in awhile." He and Tony exchanged a look as he passed but neither said anything.
Slowly sitting up in the bed, I tried not to grimace from the ache of my body but Tony hurried to my side to help me. "What happened Molly? Are you okay?" He placed a hand on my belly as he spoke. "Is the baby okay?"
"I'm okay, the baby is okay too." I said. I explained what happened from the time I left him until now, as much as I remembered anyway, and when I was finished he still looked upset.
"I'm sorry Molly, I should have been here...if I'd been here..." Tony trailed off and ran his hand through his hair.
"Tony, there was nothing you could have done." I said. "Besides, we're all still here so it's okay." I smiled and put my hand on top of his. "Now tell your son it's not time for him to come out yet."
"My son?" Tony looked up at me in surprise.
"Well I'm just guessing." I said with a small laugh. I laid back on the bed and Tony continued to touch my belly gently and he may have even talked to the baby but I drifted off to sleep again.
I was in the hospital for almost a week by the time Doctor Nan felt confident enough to release me. Boris had sent flowers, though I don't even know how he knew I was in the hospital, maybe he'd heard from my family or Tony.
------
Doctor Nan signed off on my going back to work - on light duty. The first day back though, I almost wished she hadn't. After spending a week in the hospital, rumors were flying all over the office about me. Some had noticed the pregnancy belly and they put two and two together. "Why didn't you tell me?" Marisa asked with a scandalous smile. "Who's the father? You have some rather attractive men in your life..." she teased.
"Colin is still in town," I said changing the subject. "I don't know if that's a good thing..."
"Why, don't you want him close? Maybe the two of you can make up." she waggled her eyebrows at me and grinned.
"Oh I doubt it," I said sadly. "I have to get back to work Marisa, we'll talk later okay?"
"Sure sure, I was needed in make up twenty minutes ago." she said dismissively.
"Nice of you to be on time." I called after her as she left. I turned back to the work on my desk and saw a post-it note right on top reminding me to call Boris back; he'd called and emailed a couple times while I'd been in the hospital. Glancing at the time, I hoped Boris would still be awake and I pulled out my phone and checked my email while waiting for him to pick up.
"Molly? Are you alright?" was his greeting.
"Fine, more or less. Long story." I said pushing off what was sure to be an inevitable discussion. Tony and I couldn't exactly keep the baby a secret that long. We talked for several minutes, he had a few questions about the model in the profile my pictures had been used for.
"And you know this guy?" Boris asked.
"Mmhmm, he's a regular model here." I said. "Nice guy." I added. Once I'd satisfied all his questions about Caleb, he tried once more to get me to tell him about why I was in the hospital but he let it drop when I brushed it off again. I was on the phone with Boris when I felt the baby kick for the first time actually. "Oh wow."
"What?" Boris asked, when I didn't respond he tried again. "Molly, you there?"
Finally tuning back into the conversation, I had a goofy smile on my face I almost wished Boris could see. "Yeah I'm here - sorry got distracted by something at work. I have to let you go Boris."
"Sure sure, I'll talk to you later Molly." Boris said before we hung up. I spent the next hour with my hand across my belly hoping the baby would kick again.
------
Tony and I talked nearly every day. He couldn't stay in Paris indefinitely as he had work but he was worried about me and the baby. I assured him over and over that I was taking it easy and that everything was fine.
Dr. Nan, also concerned about the pregnancy, had started scheduling me for appointments every two weeks instead of monthly. Tony insisted on coming to every single appointment. She had an ultrasound machine in her office and would do a quick scan at each appointment. As a result, my baby was already getting quite the collection of pictures. "Get used to it kiddo." Colin said when I showed him the baby's latest picture. "Your momma takes her camera everywhere."
I laughed, "It's true, I think I need a very large baby album." In the weeks since the hospital, Colin had been around a lot. Although I was thrilled with this turn of events, I couldn't believe it would last long.
When I'd told Colin about Sean's gallery in Paris, he and I went over together. I was glad I got the opportunity to see Sean's work but even happier I'd reunited the two friends. Colin started staying in Paris constantly to visit with Sean, and maybe to get away from his mother a bit from what Sean said.
When my birthday came around, I didn't really have anyone else to spend it with so I invited the both of them over for dinner. "Happy birthday Mols" Sean said, kissing my cheek. Colin kissed my other cheek and the three of us sat down for dinner together. "Tell me Mols, why are we having pancakes for dinner?" Sean asked. I suspected a silent warning passed between Colin and Sean because he quickly added, "Not that I mind of course - just curious."
"Well, I'm the pregnant birthday girl and I had a craving." I replied with a smile.
"Fair enough." Sean conceded. "Pancakes it is."
------
Tony and I had agreed to find out the gender of the baby. While part of me wanted a little girl, mostly I wanted to know so that I could go shopping. Tony, though he'd be perfectly happy with either, wanted a little boy. His flight came in just an hour before my ultrasound appointment so we met at the hospital on the day of the ultrasound.
"What do you think it is?" Tony asked as we waited for the elevator. "Any mother's instinct?"
"Marisa says it's a girl but I think that's because she wants me to have a life size Barbie doll." I said with a laugh. "But I don't know, I'm kind of leaning toward boy - Little T." I looked down and rubbed my belly affectionately
"Little T?" Tony asked just as the elevator doors slid open.
"Little Tony." I explained with a grin. "Not that we have to name him...or her...Tony."
"Little T....I like it." he laid a hand on my belly as we walked into the office. We barely had a chance to sit down before being called back by the ultrasound tech.
After I was settled and everything was ready, the same tech who had confirmed the pregnancy looked over at us with a smile. "Before I get started, do you want to know the gender?" We nodded. "Okay then." he said and turned the monitor to face us. Tony's face was glowing through the whole scan but the tech saved the money shot for last. "What do you think?" he asked.
Tony looked at the screen uncertain but I'd spent the last few weeks looking at ultrasound images on the web. "Looks like a boy." I said. "Am I right?"
"Yes, you're having a baby boy." he said. He printed out a few images, one of which had "It's a boy!" typed on it and handed them to me. "Congratulations. Your baby looks good, he's got ten little fingers and ten little toes. Dr. Nan will go over everything at your next appointment no doubt but he looks good you two."
"Thank you." Tony said, shaking his hand as I used the towel to remove the gel once again. After he left, Tony turned to me with a huge smile. "We're having a boy!"
I chuckled. "Yes I heard."
------
"What about Anthony?" Tony suggested. "It's a good name." We'd been talking about names since we found out we were having a boy and had yet to settle on one. In fact I was pretty sure we were going in circles.
"Yeah but then he'd be a junior and I just...I don't know..." I couldn't really explain why I didn't like juniors but I did like the idea of having a name similar to Tony's.
"Only if we give him Stark as a last name." Tony countered. "He could be Anthony Gregory or Anthony Gregory-Stark..."
"I am not hyphening my baby's last name, imagine his first day in kindergarten!" I said with a laugh. "And my brothers will add plenty of Gregorys to the world - of course his last name will be Stark - it's your last name."
Tony was silent for a moment; to me it had seemed obvious what the baby's last name would be but maybe Tony hadn't realized this. "Okay well what about Michael for your dad....or Hank for mine."
I frowned, "maybe" was my noncommittal response. "Think some more about it Tony - I need to get some work done on this layout. Talk to you tomorrow?"
"Sure. Night Molly." he said and we each hung up. I took a seat at the drafting table to work on laying out my photographs for work.
"What about Edward?" Colin called from the kitchen where he was making dinner for the two of us. I'm glad I was in the other room and he couldn't see me crinkle my nose. When I didn't respond, I heard him chuckle softly. "Guess that's a no on Edward then?"
------
I got the e-vite to Ruby's triplet's birthday party in April and my first impulse was to laugh - Crescent Bay was a long way from Paris. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was about time we dropped the little bomb that we were having a baby. "What do you think?" I asked after explaining it all to Tony.
"Well we do need to tell everyone, and I guess better to tell them in person." he said. "Will you be okay to travel?"
"Yes, Dr. Nan isn't worried about it." I said, my mouse hovering over the RSVP button. "She says everything is looking wonderful and Little T seems to be staying put finally."
And so, in the last week of April, after a last minute appointment to verify that I really was okay to travel, I was sitting on a plane with Tony by my side. He'd flown into Paris so we could take the trip to Crescent Bay together.
I was in the process of ripping a paper napkin to shreds when the fasten seat belt sign came on and the plane began to land. Tony put his hand over mine and smiled at me. "It will be fine. They're our friends..."
"I'm a little more anxious about my parents..." I said. Tony's smile faded as he thought about that.
"Oh right...well I'm sure that will be fine too..." he didn't sound near as convincing as he had before.
No one in Crescent Bay knew we were coming, we'd decided to make it a surprise, so there was no one waiting for us at the airport when we landed. We drove to my parents' house first and as we approached the door, I turned back and into Tony. "We have to tell them sometime Molly." he said, all the nervousness from the plane had slipped away from him. He had a new resolve about him and I soaked it in.
"Right." I said, turning back around climbing the steps slowly. I thought about just walking in but opted for knocking instead. As we waited for someone to open the door, I started fidgeting again and Tony put a comforting hand on my back.
The knob turned and my dad opened the door, one look at my face and he turned back and called for my mom to tell her. When he looked back though he noticed the belly, "Molly! You're...."
"Pregnant!" my mom shrieked from over his shoulder. She pushed him aside and grabbed my hand, dragging me inside. I looked back to Tony and saw him nodding in greeting to my dad as he entered the house. "Where's Colin?" my mom asked as she practically pushed me onto the couch. Tony didn't sit down right away but I shot him a panicked glance and he was by my side, rarely taking his eyes too far from my dad.
"Um, well that's....you see, Tony is the baby's father." I said, smiling over at him. My dad, however, was not smiling. He was glaring at Tony. "Daddy," I said, he barely looked my way. "We're having a boy...you're going to have a grandson."
"Tony, can I see you outside? Now." my dad said sternly. It was voice I'd heard only a handful of times as a child and mostly directed at my brothers. He kissed me on the forehead just like he had when I was a child and I watched them walk out of the room together.
My mom looked at me confused. "What about Colin dear?" she asked. I shook my head and shrugged as I watched the front door for Tony and my dad to come back.
------
The triplets' birthday party was that weekend; I wasn't near as anxious about it as I had been about seeing my parents. Boris was the first to see us as we approached and the look of surprise on his face was almost priceless as he took in my figure. "Wow Molly!" Boris said finally just as Ruby turned around to face us with one of the triplets on her hip.
"Molly! You're here!" she said happily. "And you're pregnant! Oh my..." she put down the squirming toddler down and came over to us. "What? How?"
"Well I think you know how Ruby." Boris said with a laugh, trying to ease the mood a bit.
She playfully smacked him on the arm. "Well duh but..."
"Why didn't we tell you sooner?" I ventured, completing her question.
"We?" Boris and Ruby asked at the same time, their eyes grew even wider as they looked between Tony and I. "Ohh"
"Tony and I are going to be parents." I said after a moment of heavy silence.
"Ruby!" someone called from behind us, it sounded a lot like Axel, "The kids are eying the presents!"
"Oh right! Birthday party!" Ruby said, her stunned look was replaced with excitement and maybe a touch of anxiety. "Come on guys!"
------
Tony and I signed up for childbirth classes in early May. It was a little early in the pregnancy for them but Tony was eager to learn everything he could and I had a feeling there might not be time for them later with Tony's often busy traveling schedule. When we walked into the room the first time, mostly I noticed that everyone seemed to be even bigger than I was and considering I already felt like I was carrying a house - that was impressive. The next thing we realized was that everyone around us spoke French. Having been in France for almost four years, I had picked up a lot of the more common phrases but I still couldn't understand most of what natives said around me.
The instructor came in and started speaking in rapid French, all the couples around us started moving - I assume following instructions. "What did she say?" Tony whispered to me.
I shrugged. "I don't know." Tony and I started snickering together and then tried to decipher what we were supposed to be doing from watching the others and flipping through the pamphlets and books that were handed to us. They were all in French as well. After the class was over, I was giggling all the way back to the car. "As educational as you'd hoped for?"
"Oh yeah." Tony said sarcastically. "I think we got a lot out of that class. Perhaps we should look into another class...one that isn't in French."
------
Colin had been spending more time in Paris lately; so much in fact, I wasn't sure he hadn't rented an apartment in town. I didn't ask why because I didn't want to break the spell. It felt like we were friends again and that maybe he'd forgiven me. Of course I hadn't even forgiven myself so I didn't see how he could have but I wasn't going to turn him away. "How is Little T today?" he asked by way of greeting.
"Active." I said with a laugh while we walked toward the fountain together. "And he seems to have nestled up under my ribs...which makes breathing and everything else painful." I added.
"Pick a name yet?" he asked. He tried not to mention Tony's name and made a point of not being around if he knew Tony was going to be there. I couldn't really blame him for that though.
"No." I chuckled. "I think he'll be Little T forever." My back was killing me today and I sat down on the edge of the fountain.
"You should pick a T name then, so he can keep the nickname." Colin said with a smile. "Although I'm not sure how much he'll appreciate being called Little T when he's sixteen."
I chuckled. "I suggested Trent...it was vetoed."
"Ugh, I would have vetoed it too! Trent?" Colin looked marginally disgusted.
"What?! It's a good name...." I pouted. I felt light headed and reached out for Colin to steady myself even though I was already sitting down. The pain started in my back and radiated all around my abdomen, causing me to double over, my fingernails digging into Colin's arm. "Ow!"
"Molly?" Colin asked, concern spread his face. He reached out to steady me as the pain seemed to pass and I sat up again. "Molly? What's wrong?" After that the pain disappeared, although I still felt terribly dizzy. Colin insisted on driving me home and getting me safely into bed.
We were barely up the stairs when I felt another stab of pain - this one worse than the others. When I realized they weren't going away this time I nodded to Colin. "Call Tony..." I gasped as the world seemed to swim around me. Colin already had his phone out and was helping me up to take me to the hospital.
------
Once again I woke up in a sterile white hospital room, with Colin by my side and I had no doubt that Tony was already on a plane. "We stopped the contractions." Dr. Nan explained. "Right now, everything is fine but I'm concerned. I'd like you to stay here, on bedrest for a few days - if everything seems to be stable, then you can go home - still on bed rest. We'll talk about the details later though." she said and nodded to each of us.
Tony arrived a while later, having caught the first flight he could and stayed with me until Dr. Nan was ready to let me go home. For the first time, Colin willingly stayed in the same room with Tony for more than a few minutes. "In order for me to discharge you Molly, I need assurances that there is someone close to you - you'll be on bed rest and won't be able to do everything alone..." Dr. Nan said, looking from Colin to Tony and back to me. Even she could sense the conflict in the room as she nodded "I'll give you time to talk it over." she said finally and left the room.
"I can talk to Marisa." I suggested. "Or maybe one of my brothers..."
"Don't be silly, I can rent the empty apartment in your building." Colin said. "If it's alright of course."
I looked from him to Tony, there was no way Tony could be in Paris on a semi-permanent basis and we both realized that. "Sure." I said meekly. "I would appreciate that."
------
In the following week, I had to call the magazine and the university in regards to my internship. Being on bed rest, I couldn't go into work so I was released from the rest of the internship. Thankfully the department at the university accepted my portfolio as is by mail.
Colin started out checking in just a couple times a day and mostly by phone but as the first couple weeks of bed rest wore on, he came by more often and would stay for a few hours to watch a movie with me or just hang out. He brought me new books and magazines to read and everyday seemed to come back with more ideas to keep me occupied. He brought me a new video game system and I had to confess that I wasn't much of a gamer. "I'll show you." he said.
I spent the rest of the week playing the games he'd left me. "I'm not sure this is what they mean by bedrest." he said when he found me sitting up in bed.
"I'm in bed aren't I?" I replied. "And I'm resting..."
"Mmhmm." he replied. He picked up the other controller and took the spot next to me on the bed. We spent the whole afternoon sitting there together. I was very nearly pummelled in the game as I looked over at Colin in wonderment. Why was he here? Could he have actually forgiven me? We never really talked about it. "Molly! Head in game." Colin said, snapping my attention back to my wounded avatar.
"You know you don't have to stay and entertain me." I said. "What about work? The family business and all that?"
"I've turned most of my father's business matters over to other more business oriented minds." he said nonchalantly. "It was never something I wanted to do - only something I had to. They call when they need my signature."
I laughed. "Such a savvy business manager you are." I teased.
He smiled. "But if you'd like me to leave..." he trailed off. He didn't seem like he wanted to leave though.
"No!" I said quickly, with maybe a little too much enthusiasm. "I mean - I like the company."
"Good, because I brought a selection of movies and I wouldn't want you to watch all by your yourself." he said. "What do you want to watch first?"
I smiled at him, maybe bed rest wouldn't be so bad after all. "That one." I said pointing to the top movie on the stack. I didn't know what it was and I didn't really care.
End Molly
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